Secrets Of Making Your Man Fall in Love With You

If you are interested in a guy you are always thinking about how to make him love you. Your head is always planning strategies to make him fall in love with you. You might know for sure that you are in love but there might be no clue as to whether he has the same feeling for you. In this article you can know about the secrets behind what will make him fall for you, and you will feel more confident.

(1) Your Appearance

Always be presentable and well dressed. Don't be shabbily dressed or think you might not meet him today. Dress as if you will be meeting him every day. Don't try to over dress or present yourself in full make up. Be natural and try to be comfortable in whatever you wear. Take special care in grooming and love yourself first before you want others to love you.

(2) Your Confidence

Most men fall in love with self-confident, secured and bold women. Women who are insecure and lack confidence tend to make men feel uncomfortable as they will always depend on them and expect much from them. So whatever you do try to have confident and always have a self esteem and be proud of who you are.

(3) Your Visibility

Always try to be in the right places so that you can be visible to your man. Be in places where he might easily see you and always pretend that you are there by chance and not deliberately. Make it look and feel as if it is casual. Scientifically it is proven that the more someone see's, feels and is in the vicinity of someone there is more chance of someone falling and getting in love. So be there around him and make a point to make him look at you every time you pass by.

(4) Vanishing Act

The next biggest secret after creating a comfort level with him is to vanish. Once you know he is looking at you and has special liking for you, just disappear from his sight and keep away. Let him keep wondering and searching for his lady love. The more he starts missing you the more he will try other ways and means to contact you like SMS, call or emails. So wait patiently until you get a buzz in your mail box or mobile.

(5) Eye Contact/Keep in Touch

Eyes are windows to someone's heart and mind. So look through his eyes and see his love flashing like stars. Don't forget to give courtesy calls and be very polite and poised and never show what's in your mind until he opens up. Once you are sure of his love try to keep him busy with you or thinking of you all the time by messaging or mailing him how much you miss him and what a great time you had with him last night. Always create a ray of better things to come and much better things to expect from you.

The secrets is make the man feel comfortable whenever you have the chance or a date with him and in no time it is not hard to make him fall in love with you.

You have the power within you to make a man fall in love with you

Don't leave your future to fate or wait for him to find you. Find out the love strategies on how to make a man desire you more and deeper. You will feel much more confident when you visit http://www.squidoo.com/make_a_man_fall_in_love

Attract Love Using Love Spell

This Love Spell will help you to attract love from a yet unknown lover, draw towards you someone you would like a loving and lasting relationship with, or enhance an established relationship.

Prepare your tools & ingredients on your Altar

Incense stick and holder
A candle
A small container to hold salt
A small dish or bowl to hold water
A tall candle with holder (Red or Pink preferably)
Oil (Rose or Lavender)
Dried sage

Before you commence

Light the incense
Light your altar candle

Create your Sacred Space & Circle

Find a quiet place where you know you won't be disturbed. To create your Circle simply close your eyes and imagine a sphere surrounding you and your altar.

Call upon the elements

Concentrate on all five elements and how they are within you, represented on your Altar and in the world around you: Air, Earth, Fire and Water.

Raise energy

Raising your energy is bringing forth all your energy inside you and preparing to release it at the end of the Spell to go out into the world and create the changes you desire.

Imagine the energy in the form of a white light flowing throughout your body forming a ball of light deep in your chest. Tense every muscle in your body until you feel "fully charged." Relax and take a few deep breaths before proceeding

Recite your Spell

Anoint your tall candle with the oil by carefully and purposefully rubbing 3-5 drops of the oil all over the candle. Think of your lover as you gently rub the oil into the wax until the candle is covered and evenly scented. Set the candle in a holder at the centre of your altar. Light the candle. Scatter the dried sage around the lighted candle.

Say:

Grant to me my wish I make
Of love to give and love to take
Equal and fair bring henceforth to me
Love to share
So mote it be

Release energy

After completing your Spell you should release the energy that you raised. The energy is sent out into the Universe to manifest the changes you desire.

Stand before your altar and imagine the ball of light in your chest once more. Tense your muscles and "push" this energy outwards. Then, standing comfortably with your feet apart, thrust your arms upwards and outwards to form a star shape. Breathe out and imagine sending this energy out into the world. When finished, stand with feet together and touch each shoulder with opposite arms to form a cross against your chest.

Ground yourself

Relax, take some deep breaths and imagine and visualise the golden sphere around you becoming smaller until it disappears.

After Casting

Once Cast, don't discuss your Spell with another and be positive and expectant every day.

Alison Yates wrote this article. To learn more about Spells visit her website: http://www.alizons-psychic-secrets.com/all-about-spells.html

Alizon can Cast a Spell for you: http://www.alizons-psychic-secrets.com/spells.html

Love Yourself First

During the Summer Of Love in 1967, the Beatles presented this powerful message to the world, "All you need is love." Basically they said you can be, do and have anything when love is present in your world. You can only give away what you already have, right?

People who love themselves truly know what love is. Those individuals are able to give love to others. (Sadly there are few people who do truly and completely love themselves.)

If you think you want more love in your life simply give love away. When you discover something missing from your world, consider the absence usually reflects your being stingy about giving it away.

When you notice a shortage of love in your life, you often wind up hoarding it. How will you receive more if you are so fearful of losing what you have?

You can blame your partner, your parents, your kids, your neighbor, etc. for failing to give you enough love OR you can choose to look at yourself and accept yourself exactly as you are (all positive and self-inflicted negative aspects included).

Your self love comes from you alone. Maybe you grew up thinking you were unlovable. You can choose to continue to live in that story (being unlovable) or you can replace that story with one of being very lovable!

The way you take care of yourself reveals your degree of self love. How you treat yourself tells others how you want them to treat you.

When you love you, know you can be, do and have anything you want because you are loved. You will also feel and receive love from others who support you.

Recently a friend spent time with me while I visited each of my adult children. She later told me that she was sure her kids know she loves them AND that she does not tell them, "I love you" often enough. I raised two great kids who have always and will continue to hear those words over and over again from me.

You may well have a different definition of love from those who you love. Your loving gestures may go unnoticed-or worse, be misinterpreted as uncaring behaviors or thoughtlessness.

Speaking the words, "I love you" tells a person you love them, but make sure you also express your love in the other ways your person needs.

Nothing can stop you when you choose to be someone who does things you've never done. Discover how to stay on track so you don't derail yourself in Ali Bierman's free ebook What You Don't Know You Don't Know. Grab your free copy now at http://creatingthelife.com/ebook.html

Get Your Self A True Love

Have you ever felt yourself feeling like you were desperate to find someone to spend your time with? Well, SNAP out of it! Seriously. You shouldn't leave yourself in this kind of state. If you do, you are almost guaranteeing yourself loneliness or a bad relationship.

WHAT SHOULD YOU DO INSTEAD?

Learn how to actively attract love into your life. And not the desperate kind. I mean the good, head over heels in love kind where you and your partner both benefit from the relationship. It's out there. Many people find these kinds of relationships and so can you!

I know. There are so many divorces and broken hearts out there, but you really do not have to be one of them. Instead of wishing for the right love or the right situation, go out there and attract it yourself!

HOW CAN YOU DO THIS?

It's simple. We can attract anything into our lives if we know how to do this and if we take whatever actions are necessary. The law of attraction is always available for each and everyone of us. It doesn't matter who you are or where you have been. You deserve more to life than just wishing for something. You deserve to actually have it!

SO, WHAT IS STOPPING YOU?

Many people don't try something new simply because they fear change. Don't let fear of change hold you back. After all, change is what you want, right? You want your life to work out. And you can work it out.

Go to http://www.successfulfather.com and SIGN up for the FREE newsletter. BOOKMARK the site and return as often as possible to learn as much as you can!

Bryan Appleton is an author of self-help motivational literature as well as an entrepreneur and investor. He is a single father and has made it one of his life's goals to try and help other people live the lives they are dreaming of.

Future Love Predictions

Many people send me dreams about the person they love for translation. This is unnecessary, because these dreams are so simple that anyone can learn how to translate them and have objective information about the person they love, predicting their reactions and learning many things about the way they think and feel.

If you have psychological problems, then you need to learn the dream language in order to be able to translate any kind of dream, but if you simply want to be able to predict what will happen in a certain case, how he or she is going to react, if you fit together, if they are loyal, etc., you can simply learn how to interpret the dreams about the person you love by yourself, without studying the dream language.

This is a privilege you can have today because my method of dream translation is so advanced, after 19 years of conducting psychotherapy, study and research.

Today the vision I can give you about the meaning of your dreams is so clear, that you can immediately learn what you care about.

I advise you to deeply study the dream language and be able to translate all your dreams alone because this is going to help you in all fields of your life, but if you are not so sure that this knowledge will help you, or if you don't have the time to study and learn, you can start learning the basics by learning how to interpret dreams where the animus or anima appear.

The animus is the image of the ideal man for a woman, and the anima is the image of the perfect woman for a man.

Now, pay attention to the fact that I said "the image" and not directly "the perfect" man or woman, for each one.

An image is an idol. An idol is a false god that will transform you into a slave. What does it mean? It means that the image of the anima or the animus that you have in mind may not be the image of the person that will really make you happy. He or she is only the "type" that you like.

When we talk about an idol, we are also talking about an image that receives many characteristics given by your imagination. You admire and even adore an idol, because you believe that it has magical powers.

However, you might be very wrong...

An idol is only a false image: it doesn't represent your ideal match. It mainly represents the big danger of getting involved with the wrong person, while believing that they are the right one, because they have a few of the characteristics you like in a person of the opposite sex.

Therefore, you will see many dreams with the animus or anima, showing you that what you believe about the person you love is not true. You are misled into believing that you fit together, and that they are nice and they love you. You will in fact only suffer very much with all the deceptions you'll have with them.

On the other hand, you may see many dreams giving you warnings: you are despising your perfect match, because you cannot recognize him or her among the crowd, or because somebody else is imprisoning you in a relationship that won't bring you any happiness.

You have to pay attention to what is happening to you.

Future love predictions will be the main subject of your dreams if you are in love with someone. The unconscious mind that produces your dreams is so generous that it sends you infinite dreams about the person you most care about!

You certainly can predict the future thanks to calculations, because everything in nature has to be prepared before actually happening.

The unconscious mind calculates everything and sends you the results of its estimations.

This is how you'll be able to predict the future of your relationship or predict how his or her reaction will be on certain occasions, preparing your plans according to what will help you attain the results you desire, only by interpreting the meaning of your dreams!

Christina Sponias continued Carl Jung's research into the human psyche, discovering the cure for all mental illnesses, and simplifying the scientific method of dream interpretation that teaches you how to exactly translate the meaning of your dreams, so that you can find health, wisdom and happiness.

Learn more at: http://www.scientificdreaminterpretation.com

The Women Men Adore

Man looked to the skies seeking a woman he could adore

Only heaven could give him what he wanted and more...

Ravi Parmar, a bright young lawyer, finds himself sitting beside the charming demure Divya. She has all the qualities his parents would like in a 'bahu'. Convent-educated she paints and sings, cooks well and has green fingers that can turn any dry patch into a lush garden. She teaches in a play school but would like to give it up once she is married. What more could anyone want? Yet Ravi finds something missing, and cannot get himself to say yes.

Samir Khanna, an IIT graduate based in Mumbai, met Sonali at a friend's wedding. An attractive fashion designer, she impressed him immensely. He liked the way she carried herself, a smile here, a laugh there, talking respectfully to elders, lovingly admonishing children creating havoc, she seemed completely in command as the bride's sister. He was bowled over, and voiced his interest in getting to know her, with matrimony in mind.

In both cases, smart, well-settled bachelors meet young ladies with perfect credentials, yet one is willing to tie the knot right away, while the other finds something holding him back. Is it beauty, the so-important physical attributes, brains, or a combination of both that men seek? Over the years, the concept of beauty has been transformed .Beauty no longer implies a fair complexion, long hair and sharp features....Every young lady on the road is well-groomed, aware of her looks and alternatives available to enhance them. Blemishes disappear, contours change and the plain Jane gradually emerges as a charming belle.

Meek and submissive, pretty and docile, convent-educated, accomplished in domestic responsibilities, displaying no aggressive traits-these were qualities sought in young women on the threshold of marriage. These stereo types were considered 'safe', so that men could dominate and control; he would lead and she blindly follow. Such women would always be dependent not defiant, staid rather than strong-willed.

But times, they are a-changing. Men and women have come a long way. Their perceptions and attitudes, ideas and expectations have all changed radically. Both have definite ideas about the qualities they would look for in a companion. Men adore both beauty and brains,
love a thinking partner, who is smart and intelligent, with the ability to hold her own, pleasant and impressive, a gracious hostess, a good home-maker who pursues a career and has varied interests; with whom he can discuss problems, but who respects his view-point rather than push her own; who assuages and appeases his ego, rather than hurting it; who is sensitive to his preferences even though he might lack that sensitivity. She should be able to do things on her own, not wait for him to take her around, but at the same time not keep him in the dark about where she is going and what she is doing-as trust does not come easily to men. All these put together tug at his heart-strings.

This is the age of double-income families. The man alone is not the bread-winner, who runs the household, as in this age of retail booms and waves of consumerism, it is difficult to make ends meet. A working wife is sought so that a better standard of living is maintained-everyone wants to be part of the gang of 'haves' rather than the 'havenots'. Hence economic considerations are also responsible for the changing perceptions of men.

Many years ago, a cousin of mine who ran a successful business, got engaged to be married. He seemed happy and totally in love and I asked him what made him say yes. He replied that his fiancé looked 'presentable'! This translated into the fact that when he walked with her, her appearance and personality appealed to those who formed his circle of acquaintance. Another close friend, a corporate executive, tied the knot with a colleague. He felt proud of her intellect as she could talk on the same 'wavelength' as men on management issues, take decisions, and displayed efficiency in all that she did. That she wasn't cut out to be a homemaker didn't detract from her overall personality. Both these men adore the woman in their lives. For the former, social approval was the key issue, and in the latter, it was the fact that she could hold her own in a circle of men, she was the epitome of success in a man's world; when she spoke men would stop to listen.

Women across the spectrum have won adoration from men, be it for looks, personality, the cause they fight for , their accomplishments and talents. The glamour world favourites like Aishwarya Rai, Kareena kapoor and Preity Zinta are adored as spirited beauties. But the likes of Sushmita Sen score above them for their non-conventional beauty, warmth and sensibility in the right blend. Achievers like Anu Aga, Naina Lal Kidwai, Vinita Bali, Kiran Mazumdar Shaw, have made heads turn with their contribution to the corporate sector. Activists like Medha Patkar and Elaben Bhatt who took up social causes and fought for the rights of others have impressed no less. Arundhati Roy, Barkha Dutt, Swati Piramal....the list is endless.

A survey carried out among educated men in the 25-35 age group in Kolkata helped conclude that conventional beauty is no longer the only characteristic urban men adore. Pleasing personality and intelligence, warmth and sincerity, have as much appeal. Nearly 80% said they did not want women who fitted into the housewife mould. The housewife brand today stands for gossip, whiling away time in mindless activities, shopping, kitty-parties and their contribution to the home are not considered substantial enough. Their dependence is unnerving and cumbersome to manage, preventing men from doing what they would like to, never left alone to relax and unwind. The preference is for working women, accomplished and successful in their respective fields, with an identity of their own and economically independent too. Interestingly, the same men also want that after a few years, their accomplished, successful wives should give up their lucrative and satisfying careers to bring up children! Only a small section of men from large business families, who want women to be 'around', want housewives. But here too women must be smart enough to manage on their own .

Psychologists feel that men can never be content-- another person's wife always appeals more. Men are never able to grow out of their mother's shadow and always look for some of her qualities too, being a good home-maker being one of them. Nonetheless, today's man makes choices sensibly, after a lot of thought and consideration. But satisfaction is an entirely different matter, as the grass always seems greener on the other side. The man whose wife becomes a homemaker to care for his family, envies those who have working wives, sharing financial responsibilities, having a lot more confidence, are self assured and forceful. On the other hand, men with working wives often feel a twinge of regret that they can never return to a home where, when they walk in, everything is taken care of and they can just put their feet up and call it a day. For them it is a series of chores listed as their responsibility, payments to be made, a child's homework seen to, while the wife takes care of other things. In their case, as the wife shares the responsibility of earning, they must share her burden of housework, so here too, they need to display the same efficiency and time management skills. The home then doesn't seem very different from the office. Many yearn for a welcoming smile from a devoted wife, waiting to share problems and troubles, a nice home cooked meal and the freedom to just sit in front of the idiot box, surfing channels.

The male macho heart flutters at the sight of beauty, yes. But there is now a realization that beauty may be skin deep, they must scratch and peep beneath the surface, for it is the beauty within that counts. Men tend to move away from frivolous, foolish and immature young ladies. They prefer those who can command respect with their actions, think and feel for others, believe in a cause and have the guts to fight for it, shed tears while sharing another's pain, but not cry on his shoulder all the time, be with him , seek his company , but not tie him down. Men want women to understand them completely, fathom each wish and desire of theirs without their having to spell it out. The world is not without women who fit into this mould, and blessed are those women who are truly adored.

How Do Men Act When They Are in Love?

How do men act when they are in love is a question that almost every woman has wondered about at some point in time. Not all men scream from the rooftops when they are in love. The women in a man's life may have to second guess exactly what he's feeling simply because he's not open and honest about it. There are a few clues in his behavior that indicate that he's feeling emotionally connected to you. If you notice these when you are with him, it's safe to say he's falling for you.

One answer to the question of how do men act when they are in love can be found in how often he contacts the woman he's involved with. When a man is crazy about a woman he wants to talk with her and he really wants to be with her. If you're dating a guy and he's constantly asking when he can call you or when you two can go out, he's hooked. Unfortunately if the man you are involved with is constantly coming up with excuses for why he can't talk or be with you, he's not that invested emotionally in the relationship yet.

When a man is in love with a woman he wants to know everything there is to know about her. You can usually tell how interested a man is in you by the questions he asks you. If he asks you for details about your life he's falling for you. If a man is more interested in a casual dating relationship than a deep one he'll ask the general questions about how you're doing and if there's anything new in your life. If he goes into more detail and wants to know your favorite flower, color or the book you most liked as a child, he's feeling closer to you. This is a great way to gauge how a man feels about you.

Don't discount his body language when he's around you if you are trying to figure out where he is emotionally in the relationship. Men who are in love show it by their actions. They'll reach out to hold your hand, they'll put their hand on your back and they'll hold eye contact for longer than a few seconds at a time. If a man is doing these things, he's very interested in you.

Specific things you say and do can make a man feel helplessly drawn to you. If you are convinced he is the one there are things you can do to ensure he only has eyes for you. For more insightful tips about understanding men including a way to get him to fall deeply in love with you, visit this Informative Site!

You don't have to leave love to fate or chance. If you are tired of waiting for him to fall hopelessly in love, there are things you can do to make it happen now. Find out right now what you need to do to capture his heart forever.

Dating Tips For the 50s and Above

Your partner passed away of a heart attack few years back. In a way, you were glad that it was a one-time episode for he died instantly. You were not made into a nurse maid to care for an irritable hopeless invalid. Its kinda sound horrible for others to hear but you're more glad of the insurance proceeds which financed a small boutique that allowed you to be active and busy. You're 52 but your proud of it, you don't look nor feel like it. Your read about dating tips for your own age and category and not too shy to talk to friends about it.

It doesn't take very long for you to get invited in local clubs and business groups. There you meet available men and available bachelors of all ages. If ladies are hesitant to go through the dating game, the male gender is also daunted. They feel like Fred Flinstone being brought to the space age by the time machine. These Boomers are unsure how to go back to the game for the first time. Do you only kiss on the first date? How about protection, are there new and lethal sexually transmitted diseases? How about if they just go on-line dating to spare them the embarrassment of first time personal encounters? First of all, there are men who prefer older women because they are authoritative yet less demanding, mature and have the experience.

They are understanding and easy to talk with. They have a broad view of any topic. In short they are more comfortable to be with than women in their 30s or younger. Once the Boomers have started to immerse themselves into the dating game, their confidence will be slowly built-up. They feel they are attractive by the interests that they gain from the opposite sex and the respect they get from their colleagues. Some advice for the Boomers how to get that confidence and go on dates: 1.Take care of your health- a healthy and active person exudes charm that he is capable of taking care of a relationship and the future.

Go on a regular exercise routine like jogging, walking, swimming or going to the gym. Exercise wards off high blood pressure, diabetes and other illnesses. It makes the bones strong, the muscles firm and the skin healthy. Take nutritious food vitamins to give you the extra boost. A healthy person is capable or great sex and that is what this is all about. 2. Repackage yourself. Try new trends in the way you clothe yourself. The checkered shirts may be your signature in the way you dress but it may be only be appreciated by chess-playing ladies. Go to a hairdresser to get the right color and cut for your hair.

The way of dressing and haircut can take years off. 3. Develop your potential. Although middle aged, a person can live his life again by improving his knowledge and developing his potentials. Cultivate your mind, body and spirit. If before you were restricted to some activities to finance the education of the children and the home mortgage, now that you are free, indulge in pursuits that you truly love. Happiness is when you are free and enjoy what you do. 4. Plan. You should have an agenda and a time-table. See to it that your activities and up to your objective.

Schedule your meetings, your trips, your on-line chats so that you can have a pool of choices for your dates. 5. Seek. Don't be ashamed to tell people that you are seeking for a relationship. Your friends and their connections can be made to advertise your needs. Go on line. Connecting with single people is just on the tip of your fingers. It's fast, accessible and easy.6. Have faith in the universe that you will meet the man you deserve. It's never too late to meet your prince.

The author of this article Ruth

Valentine's Day: A Funny Valentine Poem

This rhyming Valentine's Day poem, "Since My Valentine Got A Computer," takes a light-hearted look at Internet addiction.

Since My Valentine Got A Computer

Since my Valentine got a computer,
My love life has taken a hit.
Nothing I say is important,
Unless it’s a byte or a bit.

Before she got her new laptop,
Everything was just fine;
Now she says we can’t talk
Unless we both go online.

"But honey," I said, "I’m attached to you;
Love is what I feel."
"That keyword isn’t relevant,"
She said, with eyes of steel.

She clicked the keyboard furiously;
The screen was all she could see,
And then to my horror and shame,
She started describing me:

"Your motherboard needs upgrading;
Your OS needs help, too.
And you definitely need a big heatsink
To cool your CPU."

"Don’t flame me, my sweet," I pleaded.
"Not on Valentine’s Day."
"Fix the bugs, and I’ll see," she said,
While looking at me with dismay.

"What ever you want, my darling;
Whatever you need; you call it.
I’ll upload or download anything,
And then I’ll go install it."

(Her hostile CD keeps replaying,
And though I don’t want to fight her,
Is this what I want for a Valentine?
I’ve been burned; can I rewrite her?)

"Are you all hard drive now," I asked;
"Is there no software in you?
Don’t you remember the good times?
Let our memories see us through."

"LOL," she said to me, chuckling.
"You’re nothing but adware.
I’ve got a gig of memory;
I’ve got no problem there."

"Please, honey, we can save it," I said.
"Our love means more than that."
"That’s not in my cache; we’re going to crash,"
She said, as she turned me down flat.

(This woman has really changed;
Do I really want to chase her?
More and more I’m thinking
It might be nice to erase her.)

"Aw, honey, don’t talk like that," I said.
"Can’t we just plug and play?
I hereby accept default,
And I’m yours, my love, come what may.

"My goal is to make you happy;
I want to be your portal,
But your sudden, distant coldness
Would test the strongest mortal.

"If we need a brand new interface,
So we can FTP,
I’m your go along, get along guy,
And I want you to stay with me."

"If you want to get into my favorites," she said,
And you want to get past my encryption,
If you want to get through my firewall,
Here is my only prescription.

"First, put up your own Web site,
And e-mail me when it’s done.
I’ll check your page rank with Google,
And tell you if you’re the one."

My life has become quite a trial,
Since my Valentine got a computer.
If I want her to care about me again,
I guess I’ll have to reboot her.

Falling in Love Is Not for Cowards

You've been dating several weeks, and you have a feeling he might be the one. He calls when he says he'll call. He shows up when he says he'll show up. Your friends like him, and he's nice to your cat. He's doing everything right, and you're pretty sure he's everything you ever wanted in a man.

But you're not sleeping well. Your hands shake when you pour a cup of coffee. You're distracted at work. And people keep asking you, "How's it going with the new romance? When's the wedding?"

You're freaking out.

What's wrong with you?

Well, nothing, really. You've reached the point in a new relationship where everything seems to be going well, but part of you is terrified that suddenly it'll end: He'll stop calling. He'll meet somebody else. You'll discover his dresser drawers are crammed with women's underwear.

And your fears are right and natural. Every time he does something right, you fall for him a little more. You're scared because you've only just met him, you don't really know him, and he holds your heart in his hands! Your mind races with questions: If he's so great, why isn't he married? Why didn't his last relationship last? And so on.

You find yourself fighting the urge to call his parents and closest friends for character references.

Let's face it. Falling in love is not for cowards. It takes strength, confidence, and poise. It becomes tempting to dissect every gesture, every snippet of dialogue with a well-meaning friend who is only too happy to advise you on your new relationship.

But don't do it.

Think of your new relationship as a seed you've planted in the ground. The seed needs time to germinate and break through the soil, but every time you discuss your relationship with a third party, you dig it up. The relationship is no longer a potentially sacred thing between two people but the subject of speculation for many others. You've robbed it of its specialness and mystery.

Avoid the temptation to ask a friend, "What do you think he meant when he said...?" Ask him instead. If he does something that bothers you, tell him. Keep the relationship between you.

Adopt a "we'll see what happens" attitude. It takes courage, definitely, but it's worth it. Give your burgeoning relationship the sun and water it deserves. Only you can decide whether a man is right for you.

Please trust yourself to do that.

Ending Relationships - Should I Stay or Should I Go?

Should you stay with your partner or leave them? Is all the pain you suffer in your relationship worth it for the good times you have together? Will it really be worth all the pain of leaving them or is it better to stay and stick it out?

In most relationships there comes a point when you have to decide whether your partner really has the qualities you need to stay together. Making the decision to stay or go is almost always a very painful and confusing time as there generally isn’t a quick fix or an easy answer to your questions.

I have a friend in a fantastic relationship who taught me that if it’s hard work it’s probably not working. This was an alien concept to me. I come from a therapeutic background which can sometimes promote the feeling that if it’s not hard work it’s not worthwhile. Years ago I made it my mission to figure out what made relationships work; there seem to be two approaches – one more successful than the other!

Two Approaches to Relationships

The first is ‘don’t expect too much from your relationship and it will work out just fine!’ Some things are always going to be problematic. So what if sex isn’t so important to one of you? So what if one party can’t be relied upon to keep their agreements? So what if you never get to go on the holidays you really want to go on because your partner hates to travel? This may well work for some but it’s just not in my nature. As far as I’m concerned, good enough just isn’t!

The second approach is to insist on great chemistry; to find a partner who isn’t perfect, but is perfect for you. The two primary areas you need to match up in are sexual chemistry and best friend chemistry. You’d think these two would be obvious to most people, but you’d be wrong. People make compromises on these points very early on and then wonder why they spend the rest of their lives hurting.

Great chemistry doesn’t mean it’ll be easy all the time - that would be unnatural. It means that you’re excited and committed enough to work through the glitches as they arise rather than let them stack up. A stack of resentments is so much easier to set fire to.

Working Out Whether to Leave

So the biggest piece of work I have clients do when they ask me to help them decide to stay or go is to get them to design their perfect partner. You may think this strange if you’re already in a relationship - but it’s just as valid now as it is when you’re single. So, what would be perfect for you?

The things you should focus on as you’re already in a relationship should be more emotional and behavioural in quality. Once you’ve sorted out what is perfect for you, you can start to ask yourself questions about your current partner to see if they meet up to your ideal. Does your loved one treat you with the level of respect you expect? Is he affectionate enough for you? Does she make enough time for you? These aren’t necessarily questions that apply to you. Ask yourself the questions that matter to you once you’ve worked out what ideal is for you.

A couple more questions you may want to ponder - If twenty years from now your partner hadn’t changed in any significant way, would you still be happy as their partner? Would you consider your life together to have been more about adventure or more about endurance?

The strange thing is we often know what the problems will be in a relationship many years in advance. The only question is, when will you handle them? We all know the longer you leave them the more painful it gets.

Work out now whether you should stay with your partner or leave them – get a free, 9 page ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go?’ report.

How I Got Rid Of Jealousy

I am ashamed to admit this but I used to have the green-eyed monster tailing me wherever I went. It was my shadow and my other half.

Of course jealousy justified its presence and suspicions. It was there to protect me. Jealousy kept telling me what I should be doing and feeling. It even told me what my partner was up to and how he should be behaving and feeling toward me.

Did I believe jealousy? You bet I did. That went on for years until I learnt a few painful lessons and decided that it should go and leave me alone for good. That happened too late though.

My suspicions when jealousy set in cost me broken relationships, distress and a deep plunge in my self-esteem and worthiness.

Having gone through what I did, I have a few points here to assist you from allowing jealousy to ruin your life.

The first thing to do is to simply make a decision to get rid of that feeling. That means telling yourself that you have had it with the attitude of being suspicious, distrusting and possessive.

Next start saying different things to yourself. Jealousy is going to remind you that if you focus on other things, your partner may abandon you. Tell it firmly that you are in control and you want to choose your own thoughts.

Have respect for yourself. If your partner abandons you, put your hurt behind and start life over. If he actually cheats on you, he is not worth your time and effort. Your life will continue to evolve no matter what happens, if you decide to make it so.

Learn how to trust and expect good things to happen. One of the reasons why we suffer is because we unconsciously expect bad things to happen. Develop faith and confidence in your relationships. It promotes better understanding, avoids stress and gives you a peace of mind.

Learn how to communicate effectively. One great tip, don’t nag. Here’s another, don’t bring out old issues and mistakes. Both irritate and put a stop for further constructive conversations.

Learn to listen without interrupting, judging and probing. Allow him to talk and finish his sentences. If you must ask, do it with the intent to seek understanding. He can tell from your words, gestures and body language if you are sincere.

Now the last but most important thing is to learn to love everyone including yourself unconditionally. No strings, no bargains and no threats.

Do You Know What Romance Is?

Romance is the spice of life. It's not difficult to visualize how dull and boring life would be without romance. Have you ever paused to wonder what it is that brings enthusiasm in life? Romance is that elixir that makes you vibrant, vivacious and full of vitality. Everyone has their own idea of romance and romantic ideas, what are your ideas of romance?

In the lines, by Shirley Bassey "I'd like to run away from you, but if you didn't come, and find me ... I would die." the essence of love and romance has been beautifully depicted. Romance is something that gives comforting touch to one's heart. Someone who's sensitive about his or her beloved's need, is romantic. Just being a hard-core romantic and not demonstrating your love openly is so unromantic. You need to put other work aside and show to your sweet heart that you care for him or her. The idea of romance can be as simple as a peck on a cheek, a warm hug or just uttering those three miraculous words "I love you." These gestures appear romantic when your beloved is least expecting them, otherwise they are the boring hackneyed way of saying that you care. Novel romantic ideas are like, "life and blood" of any romantic relationship.

For some people romance means the spirit of adventure, a sense of anticipation of the unexpected, a view of exciting spectacles at every bend of the road. For many others romance involves the mysterious and the unknown. Like 'magic casements opening on the foam of perilous seas,' as Keats would put it. Romance sweeps in all the treasured experiences from the mysterious to the magical and the miraculous. Yet for most of us romance is an expression of love. When we talk of romantic ideas we refer to all the little things that can keep the flame of love burning bright in our hearts.

We all know that it isn't enough to love a person; it is equally important to express our love in a relationship. Love without expression is as good as not there. You need to show your love, not only in words but also in gestures that speak louder than words. You have to devise novel ways of letting your love know how much you care. You have to find new ideas to express your love every day, if not every moment. Thinking of novel ways of saying 'I love you' is what romantic ideas are all about.

Everyone is not a poet, yet everyone needs to kindle the flame of love lest it fades away. This site on romantic ideas is a treasure house of fresh romantic ideas. The charm of an idea lies in its freshness, and nothing goes stale faster than ideas. So, look for absolutely novel romantic ideas to let the warm Love in!

National Hugging Day ... Reach Out and Touch Someone

As you button up your shirt, you ask, “So, what’s your diagnosis, doc?”

He pauses and then replies, “It appears you’re suffering from touch deprivation.”

Somewhat taken aback, you sputter, “Is there a special treatment for that?”

Smiling, the doctor answers, “Yes … lots and lots of hugs.”

You heard the doctor. It’s time to reach out and touch someone. No excuses now. Today, January 21 is National Hugging Day!

This warm and fuzzy holiday was created twenty years ago by Rev. Kevin Zaborney, of Caro, Michigan. One thing for certain, the man definitely chose the right time of year for this holiday. Who wouldn’t want to cosy up to someone during this cold, blustery month? Now although not officially a “national” holiday, many embrace it all the same … with the other person’s permission of course.

The word “hug” has many definitions and is believed to have originated in Scandinavia, akin to Old Norse “hugga,” meaning to comfort. Other definitions include an affectionate embrace or to clasp or hold closely. Whatever the definition, hugging is a gesture of love, of warmth, of caring … benefiting people both physiologically and psychologically.

Did you know that hugging increases the body’s endorphins (morphine-like substances in our blood and nervous systems), relieving us from pain and creating a mild euphoria? Medical facilities and treatment centres across the globe are realizing its true healing value, and now use hug and touch therapy for the treatment of pain, depression and fear in their patients. One could almost say that hugs are natural painkillers.

Unfortunately, some researchers on the subject of hugging have revealed less favourable findings. For example, some studies show that children deprived of hugs during their infancy risk growing up incapable of loving others, suggesting that a child raised without any hugging can become a psychopath or sociopath.

Virginia Satir (1916-1988), noted psychotherapist and family therapist, offered the best prescription when she advised, “We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.”

Many of us underestimate the value of hugging—the power of touch. Its effects are immediate, both the hugged and the hugger profit from the experience. And what is especially nice about hugging is that it’s not limited to only the hurting and the lonely … hugging is for everyone!

Top Ten Benefits of Hugging
1. Costs nothing
2. Boosts your immune system
3. Builds self-esteem
4. Fosters self-acceptance
5. Alleviates tension
6. Helps curb appetite
7. Saves heat
8. Is portable
9. Requires no special setting or equipment
10. Feels incredibly good!

Wow, talk about benefits! Who wouldn’t want to celebrate National Hugging Day! Come to think of it, why keep it to one day? Why not make every day a hug somebody day! Reach out and touch someone today … with their permission of course!

Fueling the Fires of Passion

What do you do when your marriage becomes routine? For many of us, the everyday routine of work, childcare, and bill paying extends to our lovemaking with our spouses. But, no matter how long you’ve been married, there are plenty of ways to spice up your love life. Let’s start in the bedroom – the hub of hubba hubba!

Gentlemen, start your engines

• Decorate your bedroom with pictures of yourself and your partner. Choose pictures that bring back happy memories of times you had as a couple. For instance, your wedding, a special date, or a vacation. Avoid hanging pictures of relatives: family pictures belong in the family room. It’s a real turn-off to see your grandparents and in-laws scowling at you while you’re naked and ready for romance.

• Speaking of mood: mood lighting can work wonders for a bland bedroom. Soft lighting helps to warm the atmosphere and it makes people look sexier too. You want to be able to see what you’re doing, without blinding your partner or having to grope around clumsily in the dark. Install a dimmer switch for a bedside lamp. Some people like to buy black lights (UV light bulbs available at Lowe's or Home Depot) because the bulbs create the appearance of a sexy tan on your bodies.

• Roses, orchids and other scented flowers can fill your room with romance. Scented candles-especially lavender and pumpkin-are a type of aromatherapy that many people find arousing.

• Lock you door! If you don’t have a lock, get one. It’s almost impossible to lose yourself in the moment if you’re worried that you will be found out any minute by an intruding child.

Ladies, start his engine

Now that the bedroom is ready for action, it’s time to use it! Ladies, sometimes it’s best to take charge and turn him on for a change. Why should he have to instigate everything? Here are a few tips to get his motor running.

• Make the first move and continue to direct the action. Men get tired of having to call the plays all the time. Having a woman take charge will be something out of a fantasy for him.

• Arrange a night out, but keep your plans a secret. What could make your man feel more special than to have his loved one plan and pay for an intimate evening together?

Another way to show your partner that he is desired is to play up the little things.

• Leave little love notes in his lunch box and on his pillow. His coworkers might give him some grief at first. But, every other man will be wishing his wife left notes for him.

• Demonstrate a bit more affection in public. No need to embarrass him or make him feel uncomfortable. But mini massages, kisses on the cheek and toying with his hair are ways to let him feel that he is desired. Let the world know you’re in love. Let the world - and your man – know that you just can’t keep your hands off him. That’s a real ego boost for a man. He’ll appreciate it and feel flattered.

• Dress up once in a while. Toss off the flannel and turn up the glamour. Strut your stuff and remind him how beautiful you really are. When you were dating, you dressed to impress and to attract. Dress tonight like you dressed when you were dating

Every couple has their own ways of showing affection. Also, every couple needs to be comfortable with new ways of demonstrating romantic gestures. So, try some of these suggestions. See which ones work best for you-and for him. Doing the things you did when you wanted to get married might just be the things that help you stay married. Turn back the romance clock, and turn on the fun.